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Sarah Maria Tagliabue @ All Right Reserved 

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The method was born in the early 1980s by Bert Hellinger, who states that everyone's life, even before birth, is conditioned by destinies and feelings that are not truly personal. Even serious illnesses, failures, problems with money, difficulties at work or in relationships can be due to disorders in the family system which must be brought to light in order to be let go. Children who out of love take upon themselves the fate of their parents or grandparents, children who grow up with the weight of the suffering of an excluded relative, or who even unconsciously choose to die in someone else's place.

You understand well that this type of gaze makes the difference even in working with children!

Especially if they are born after an abortion,

they are the "surviving twin" or if they bear the name of some family member who had a particular destiny.

The work to be done will therefore be to put everyone back in their place and give everyone back their own destiny; honor the dead, let the living live, include the excluded.

Reconstructing your family's family tree, noting all the events and significant relationships involving your ancestors, is the first step towards healing.

Often many events are not known, because they are kept hidden by the family clan (betrayals, murders, mental illnesses...) and emerge predominantly during a Constellations session.

What interests us most here is to understand that there are rules that must be respected in every system, orders of love that must be honoured.

They are:

1. BELONGING : we all have the same right to belong to the family of origin of which we are part.

2. HIERARCHY : each of us occupies our own specific place within the family, both of origin and in the one we build. Whoever entered first has precedence and is large compared to whoever entered later who is small . A child cannot, for example, take the father's place next to the mother, just as the parent of a parent cannot.

3. GIVE-TAKE : the moment we take or receive something from someone we feel obliged to reciprocate, we feel "guilty" until we have given back.

You understand, therefore, that even before coming into the world, every child belongs to a system, to a morphogenetic field, which includes not only the living, but anyone who has left a trace in that system.

When working with children it is therefore unthinkable not to pay attention to the entire system.